dj co pilot, jef rear guard, tyler captain, three men one week so few plans PEOPLE PEOPLE EVENT PERSONS TATTOOS (bigger font) CLAM CHOWDER! we headed out around 9, few energy drinks in tow, iphone directions saved, blasting the likes of thrice, one republic, sick puppies and other road trip favorites. night time is the best time to start... nobody else on the road, people can sleep (or attempt... my bad), and border crossing is easiest. like... two questions. i didn't even have a CHANCE to stutter or get nervous. easy peasy. i took my shift until about... 2-3ish until my body started long blinking and then dj took over for like 9 hours. t a n k of a man. he captains well. by the time he wanted to duck out and sleep some more we were only an hour out of portland, and twenty minutes later we got out of the car near a waterfall to do a little photoshoot at jef's bidding. they turned out pretty sweet.. when we got to portland we parked in a super inexpensive lot (YEAH sunday/merica/before 5:30pm) and ventured out into a city yet wandered. and went ten minutes before we discovered an open sushi joint and planted our behinds behind the freshly opened conveyor belt of amazing food. we decided to come back later when it was happy hour so we could get more for cheaper... but then we didn't. but we DID continue wandering, for several hours around the many blocks the portland city center has to offer. we ignored potentially amazing doughnuts, partook in the careless searching and erotic banter of pipe purchasing, stole starbucks wi-fi... and punched out of the parking lot to go meet my friend steve at buffalo wild wings for some beer.
break.
after deciding to not find directions to b-dubs and just SEEK it, we found ourselves with 4 hours to murder. we found a starbucks and park-napped in front of it whilst stealing wi-fi for a few hours then decided to car wander some more to get rid of another two hours before we met steve. we found a target, some cheap merican sheesha, another starbucks to steal wi-fi from, then parked it up at bww's to meet steve! we had some delightful talk getting to catch up and getting to know each other (jef an deej) and had some delicious blue moon beer and the second best burger i've ever had (really? you say... let me tell you... chili cheese burger was ridic. from a chain no less. suuupriiiised. i had that expectation for ferg berger and it WAS the best. i had no expectations for this one and it shocked my mouth into a second place submission). all in all good, great and happy, we took off towards cannon beach and found an rv parking lot once we got there and crashed for the eve in scout. ... not before finding mo's, and evading probing police. we slept mildly great.
double break.
we awoke hankering for some beach action, so we jettisoned scout behind someone's house and bailed onto the cold ass beach. haystack rock.. familiar still, beautiful always.. no puffins, but plenty of starfish to be seen. jef got attacked by the sea and his wet socks survived to tell the tale. mo's didn't open until 11, so we meandered here and there and drove south for awhile until we came across a gigantic view of the pacific that we couldn't not get out and pee in front of. we were really hoping to find some starbucks to steal wi-fi from, but the good old small coast has yet to be tainted by such infectious royalties. we found another secluded little beach, broke in our new celebration pipes, and escaped from further wet socks by scaling barnacle clad rocks into rock vagina caves. we took pictures in one, and have cave pipes in the other. all whilst observing some locals surfing, walking dogs, interacting with nature.. hot. so good. so fresh... we discussed what kind of dogs happened to be our ideal mates, and it was deemed that deej would be best suited with an irish wolf hound, jef a husky, me with a border collie, and later marc with a lab or golden retriever. these desires have left certain aspirations in our heads as to the near future. we want puppies. all of us. i also googled border collie rescues but didn't let myself linger for fear of making a commitment i'm not capable of actually making yet. my dog janitor and me will have to wait to meet... but i digress! we wandered through the forest back to the car after having successfully enjoyed several hours at this lovely beach and headed to mo's, the main purpose for this entire trip. the fulcrum, if you will, for events to transpire before and after said feeding. i was pretty sure my 'best chowder ever' statement would stand, but knowing my amorous attraction to exaggeration, jef'n deej were unsure if such a boast could be met. steve helped a lot when he said it was the perfect reason for such a road trip, and that we should anticipate the freshness of the clams by enjoying a rare crunch of sand in our mouths upon eating. the freshness. we sat down, ordered a beer, and within five minutes had a family bowl of original clam chowder in front of us. we spoke a blessing, asked for a blessing, and ingested a formidable size of chowder before we decided we were happy and content, not to the point of bloating but within the CUSP of pure satisfaction. i'm unsure what the other lads thought, but it was cemented into my head that yes, this indeed was still the best clam chowder i have ever consumed. mission #1 complete.
break three, not break dance.
hours, naps, and miles later we entered seattle, fresh off of a phone call with marc giving us the location of our hostel home. the drive had been... apprehensive, as we battled with slow cars and the ever evil prius (most notably the car that stopped the free flow of speed 80% of the time... and if not a prius, then a truck, who is understandably slow, but quick to gain the accusation of 'bitch ass' as it towed not one, nor two, but three prius' in it's truck bowels.). gaining any speed over 70mph was a massive blessing, and finally arriving at the minas tirith of merican cities was surely a relief. our hostel was located on pike st and first ave, a mere stones throw away from pike place, and blocks away from other seattle staples (cough. ivar's. second cough.). i thought marc said green han____ or something, so i erased the second word from my focus and started searching for the green lantern. i did not find it or him, but i DID find the green tortoise, our home for the next two glorious nights. it was fairly cheap for four of us to stay in the same room with each other, as well as park scout in a lot for a hostel cheapened total of $36 over 45ish hours. the room was typical hostel, but clean and with access to kitchen, eggs, internet, cool explory people, and excellent showers. i highly suggest hooking yourself up with one if the chance ever happens across your lap. do it. we settled quite quickly and showered, pooped, updated statuses and headed out on the town. first stop, ivar's, the second best clam chowder i have ever had. 1 and 2 in the same day. so o o o o o o so spoiled. chowder heaven, was i in. we parted ways with our new friend jonathan from scotland, and made our way to the elysian, as suggested by our new friend jonathan from scotland. we clinked our beers together and decided tonight was a pub night, a solo adventure down pike st on the way back to our hostel, a beer a bar as long as no cover was charged, and that it was a bar/pub, not a show/club. here's the breakdown of our lovely cut monday night.
elysian- i had a mens bathroom, a red beer, and we politely talked about women, the state of our social stage in life, and how excited we were to enter the stages of half cut - cut with each other on THIS VERY EVE.
the unicorn- we discovered a $3 beer for $2 (since obviously it was happy hour, OUR happy our) (rolling rock) and the most creative corn dogs available to us at that hOUR. it was like... tubby dog. on a stick. and less extravagant but equally creative. and we talked about women, the naked girl getting a photo shoot in the corner, the state of our social stage lately, and how excited we were to have 1 1/2 beers in us on a monday night. in seattle.
cha cha- i'll say most suave (not shrewd) bar, interesting decor, people and another round of doubly inexpensive drinks (rainier). i sat in a broken chair, stud to my right, stud to my left, and stud directly across from me. we talked about women, how this bar rocked and would be a frequent of ours should we live in seattle, the future state of our social state, and how as we left the girls in the booth behind us seemed super disappointed.
quinn's- with an epic name like odin's gift, i knew this red beer to be something special. it wasn't, but i still enjoyed it. i fantasized about another piece of pizza that i had consumed in between bars, but settled in by thinking about how i could always get another one later. we talked about women, the chase and collapse, how water was a pretty good idea, the immediate future of our social state and how excited we were to tackle the next bar.
honey hole- surely the classiest name we'd come across, and with yet another cheapy beer (olympia) our stay here was sure to be ... sweet. and short. so short. and spilly. we lasted ten minutes, made a minor sloppy mess of our table, and forgot to talk about women or sex or sociality or excitement. only urination was discussed.
six arms- the height of cut-ed-ness. we all ordered different beers with general names, i chose wheat, jef chose something redish and decided to snort pepper. dj wanted in and snorted salt. marc and i bah-ed and followed suit, only to find regret and no glory for thinking in a like-drinky-mind. we talked about urination, spilling, how we just peed in that alley, and how glad we were the next bar was probably closed.
the taphouse- it was not closed. but we had a good several blocks to separate ourselves from our liquid selves. and peed. but mostly walked into this place with a hyrulian thirst for exploration, and felt like we were entering a dungeon of some sort as we descended the stairs into this haven of magic. lining the wall behind the bar were many many MANY taps. we thought they were decoration. they were not. so we had pirate named beer and cheapish appies and congratulated ourselves on proposing this to be the last bar regardless of what we came across. responsibility, thy name is monday night and a fear of the hangover. we talked of women, social degradation through expectation, radiohead, and beds.
break four... a smoke.
tuesday we encountered a wonderful self made breakfast with self poured juice and self butter spread toast. actually wonderful and we had quite our fill. it was a wondrous time of contemplation, hipstamatic lenses and films, and prospects for our day. we opted to wander a different direction than before, and found an area quite like gas town in vancouver, except merican. but not before heading to the wondrous victrola cafe, home of my favorite chai ever (now that it can be defined in that way..), and a whole morning spent on papers, photo editing, tattoo drawing and words free with friends. a delightful studly morning of academic behavior and celebration for conquest. steamed milk conquest. huzzah. after spending most of the day wandering around and becoming intimate with seattle, it was time to head to the hostel for a night of watching our new favorite show, archer, and not drink. which lasted (for marc and i) until after supper when a cute girl from s. carolina (ish... more like georgia...) asked if we wanted some wine which lead to some cool conversation which led back to the taphouse for a few more beers but mostly just some quality stranger to friend transition time. jef and deej hit up the cheesecake factory and gorged themselves into an early sleep submission. it was a fine finale evening to the seattle dream, and we slept like champions. in the morning there was a trip to the aquarium sans me, who sat in a lovely cafe (second best cup of coffee in downtown seattle i hear) and drew tattoos for two hours. another blessed splendid morning, followed by more pier photoshooting and ivar's indulgence. after that, it was pack up, get comfy, and head north to the border. and eating spicy mcchicken sandwiches. le delicious. merica!
break five! that was a good one. hope you didn't jam your wrist.
i suppose it would have been wednesday that we arrived in victoria... frosty, snowy, the cold that chills to the bone because you're near the ocean.. we quickly started drinking after we had 'settled' and waiting in anticipation for our dear friend thom to meet us at marc's lovely apartment. we smoked sheesha from the first hookah i ever smoked from, and started contemplating what to do with our night. once thom and jolly (his girlfriend holly... adorable couple. just. the cutest.) arrived we decided to play telephone pictionary, which quickly turned into penis-sex-racism telephonemakemelaughsuperhard pictionary. a delightful game. since our brains weren't challenged enough, we then moved onto the infallible game of charades, some of us familiar with the passionate adventure guessing game and some of us familiar with the simpler, less enjoyed game. the adora-couple and i took on the male adora-couple and marc, each with seven words thrown into a toque for the other team to rip apart with their fanatical acting skills. there were some impossible words, and some not so hard words, but the first round was a rousing adventure into the beginning stages of impassioned competition and frustration, but not yet with any soup-mario incidents. i believe my end lost, but dead away we started another round, dedicated on blowing each other out of the water with frustration and challenge. ten words apiece, and probably two hours later it was 4 am and thom + holly decided it was time for bed. i also thought this would be the case for us, until i came back from a doortime goodbye to marc and jef on one side of the room scribbling words, and dj with an empty chair on the other side of the room with paper ready to be scribbled on. the gloves were off, and we played for another two ish hours, taking our total charades time to about 6 1/2 hours. alcohol played no influence (until the next morning when we discovered how easily some of our words could be taken apart... shrewd... nude... shit) as our brains were far to immersed in the best of games. we slept well-ish, strewn about the apartment, stirring words around in our brains. we awoke to a sexy breakfast from marc (oh we were good alright..) and headed into the town to photoshoot, consume sushi, and question union tattoo if our previous arrangements were still for the win. all was good with the exception of the closure of red fish blue fish, whom we assume like many other of the shops in vic had closed because of the unexpected half foot of snow. it was a sad, sad day. until the sushi, and then the amazing meet up with marc's parents and the annihilation of very delicious food. i don't remember the last time i was that full, or full of joy from seeing parents i hadn't seen in a very long time. still hyped on the thought of games, we bought four decks of cards and headed to marc's, and after barely an episode of archer were all passed out and unaware of any competition remaining inside of us. but of course... this was all after we dressed up super studly like and headed to the tower for martini's and photoshoots. jef was a gentleman professional, and got us permission to have a corner booth while he shot us looking hot and sheepish, so we celebrated each other, cheap appies and talked extensively about justice, God, ether, women, how good we looked, tattoos, and heavy things. it was a grand night and once again we earned our sleep.
break six. the final chance for tea and coffee.
i actually don't remember which morning had the sexy breakfast anymore.. it was actually probably this one. our only agenda for the day was getting inked. and more photoshooting, but just marc. jef was up first, and with our half hour we went to the cheap sushi place and got a delicious shrimp tempura with salmon avacado combo. mateio was yet again an amazing hilarious speedy artist who appreciated my designs and hugely encouraged me to pursue an apprenticeship. i asked him if he'd be willing, but with three kids and a fourth about to pop out, time was not on his side. i was fully prepped and ready to move to vic given the chance, but alas calgary is indeed destined to be my home base. jef took about an hour plus one half, then deej was up for about an hour, and then i hopped in for the most painful almost two hours of my tattoo life. the chest is NOT a happy place to get needled into. collar bone too. fun times though! we had a wondrous experience at union once again and are happy to say we'll go back there again. too good to not. exhaustedly we packed up at marc's and said our loving goodbyes and made our way to the ferry for the last time on this trip. we missed the 7, napped until the 9, napped through the ride and took off through van towards our dalhome. ten hours later, into bed we dove, ready to take on inn from the cold for an all nighter of risk and man church love. i dub reading week successful in the highest.
